Hey, let's talk about lists. No, not grocery list. Okay, so I'm sure most, if not all, of you have heard the term BUCKET LIST, right? For the couple of you that don't know, a BUCKET LIST is a list of things that you want to do or places you want to visit (stuff like that) before you kick the BUCKET (die). I've seen a few posts where people list the items on their BUCKET LISTS and how excited they are to check things off (Hmm, IDK - kinda screams of a countdown to me...)
But this is NOT going to a be a BUCKET LIST post. Oh no, that would be too regular and you know your girl has to be different. So this is going to be a post about my ANTI-BUCKET LIST...AKA Things I do NOT plan to do...
1. Buy season tickets for any baseball team. I am not a baseball fan by any stretch of the imagination. Will I go to a game? Yes, but I won't be happy about it and there had better be BEER, HOT DOGS and POPCORN.
2. Porn. Really no need to explain this one.
3. Play with, touch or get close to frogs. OMG! I have a weirdly strong phobia about frogs. Not sure why since they don't bite but sheesh, I can't stand them (Okay Kermit is okay and his alter ego Hooded Kermit rocks!)
4. Be arrested. Again, no explanation needed.
5. Go on a cooking show or competition. My skills are okay but have you seen some of the things they want you to make into something edible? There's this show that gives you a basket of CRAZINESS and says make something culinarily (is that a word? I don't think so but I like it!) culinarily creative and delish. Ok, so you tell me how to make a meal out of chocolate covered ants, chicken hearts, squirrel ass, grape leaves and whip cream. Go ahead, I'll wait.
6. Climb Mt. Everest. Yeah, I know this is actually on quite a few BUCKET LISTS but nah, no thanks. First of all it's cold up there and takes 5-ever to get up there. And then once you get up there (if you aren't frozen or blown of the side of the mountain first) what then? Exactly what are you going to do up there? Sure, take pictures and jump up and down (carefully, of course) proclaiming your victory against Mother Nature. But guess what? Now you have to get down!
7. Drive the track at NASCAR. Okay so I'm a careful driver. I mean I'm not doing 45 in a 65 but I'm also not doing 105 in a 70. I cannot even imagine going faster than 200 mph in a car...driven by me. And on top of that, you're going in a CIRCLE!!!! Corners, I mean turns would be scary as...yeah no thanks!
8. Relax my hair again. When I decided to get rid of my relaxed hair days, I went through the whole transition process - the different textures, the breakage and ultimately the big chop. There is no WAY I am going through that again. (Those weren't always the cutest of day, IJS). Why would I do that again? My hair is relaxer free and has been for years and now I can rock my hair like this...
9. Chase or try to convince someone to be in my life. Sure, this is mainly referring to a relationship/dating/talking situation. But I choose to apply this to my life and interactions in general. So this also encompasses acquaintances and friends. I didn't run track in high school and college. What I look like running behind a grown person for their time and attention? Nope, miss me with that!
10. Settle. That's it. I refuse to settle for anything less than great. I've done that before in different situations - putting myself last, accepting way too much and making way too many excuses for people. Not doing that. I know my worth...my value...as a friend, as a partner - in life or ventures. You match that...bring that..or keep that.
So that's my list - at least for the moment - of things on my ANTI-BUCKET LIST. Now you know what I'm not going to do, what about you? Send me an email at mackgurl@gmail.com or drop a response in the comments and let me know.
Kisses,
Mackgurl
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