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Why the chicken REALLY crossed the road...


WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Yes, I've heard this question bantered about before...countless times in fact. Is everything in life a joke? Sheesh, it wasn't even a good joke. To get to the other side? Really?? So here's the real deal and not some Kentucky fried bucket of...(takes deep breath...) Anyway, it was like this....I grew up on a farm running around playing with the other chicks who grew up there, too. When I grew up, I was separated from my parents and was settled in to this sort of apartment style dormitory. It was nice, furnished. The temperature is set at an optimal level for MY comfort. 

Anyone would have thought I had it made. And why wouldn't they? Someone came along and built me a house and furnished it... I even had some close girlfriends to hang out with...and let me tell you, these chicks are CRAZY!!! We cackle and talk alllllll the time. Well almost all of the time... which brings me back to the original question you asked...

Listen, can you imagine how tiring it has to get running from a rooster? Have you seen these fools run?!! Imagine being chased by one whose sole purpose is to mount you! No romance, no flowers, no dates just straight up (takes another deep breath)...a girl wants to sleep sometimes! But nooooo not Mr. Cock-a-doodle-doo. He gets up at the crack of dawn, always before anyone else - never letting anyone sleep in (friggin' narcissist)...and then he starts yelling at the top of his lungs!!! Not one time, but every GODDAMN DAY!! And not just to let everyone know he's awake...no this joka doesn't shut up until everybody is up - cows, horses, dogs - even the DAMN farmer is up now. Then Mr. COCK OF THE WALK, proceeds to walk the halls doing that COCKY strut to see who's the lucky lady of the day. 

Well you know what? I had had enough! No more unwelcome visits from Mr. Cockerel! He ends up satisfied and I end up carrying babies that I don't even get to keep! Yeah, the farmer's no help. He profits from my misery. So one day, I said I'm out. I'm leaving this coop, this cockery, this farm. I'm going somewhere I can be free and some place I can keep this cockamamie bantam fool off of me!! And just like that, I crossed the road...


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Comments

  1. SupeApril 23, 2020 at 1:44 PM

    Thank you so much for giving us the details to this situation. I'd always known that there was more to this story and you held the secret. I'm definitely spreading the word. Keep up the great work!!!

    Your #1 Fan,

    Supe

    ReplyDelete
  2. SherahOctober 3, 2021 at 8:42 PM

    Yesss ❗ me and my chick friend would of jumped that rooster 🐓 🤣🤣🤣

    ReplyDelete

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